For Sauce: Melt butter in heavy large saucepan over medium heat. Add onion and sautÃ© 3 minutes. Add remaining ingredients and bring to boil, stirring frequently. Reduce heat and simmer until sauce is reduced to 2-2/3 cups, stirring occasionally, about 30 minutes. Season to taste with salt and pepper. (Sauce can be prepared 1 week ahead. Cover and refrigerate.)
Make Dry Rub:
Mix all ingredients in small bowl. (Can be made 1 week ahead. Store airtight.)
Place pork, fat side up, on a work surface. Cut each piece lengthwise in half. Place on a large baking sheet. Sprinkle dry rub all over pork; press into pork. Cover with plastic; refrigerate at least 2 hours. (Can be made 1 day ahead. Keep chilled.)
Mix all ingredients in bowl. Cover and refrigerate.
Following manufacturer's instructions and using lump charcoal and 1/2 cup drained wood chips for smoker or 1 cup for barbecue, start fire and bring temperature of smoker or barbecue to 225F to 250F. Place pork on rack in smoker or barbecue. Cover; cook until meat thermometer inserted into center of pork registers 195-205F, brushing with cold mop every 45-90 minutes, about 6 hours total. Add more charcoal as needed to maintain 225F to 250F temperature and more drained wood chips (1/2 cup for smoker or 1 cup for barbecue with each addition) to maintain smoke level.
Transfer pork to clean rimmed baking sheet. Let stand until cool enough to handle. Shred into bite-size pieces. Mound on platter. Pour any juices from sheet over pork. (Can be made 1 day ahead. Transfer pork and any juices to baking dish. Cover with foil; chill. Before continuing, rewarm pork, covered, in 350 degree oven about 30 minutes.
Divide pork among bottoms of buns. Drizzle lightly with barbecue sauce. Top with coleslaw of your choosing. Cover with tops of buns.
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